Yep. It happened. I sat down on January 1st and wrote the first section or chapter or whatever the hell you want to call it. Then, on January 2nd I read it…said, “This is shitty” and rewrote the first section or chapter or whatever the hell you want to call it. I read that back and said, “Still shitty.”
It is gonna be a long and painful process. Like really painful…
There is a quote by E. L. Doctorow that I am quite fond of… “Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia.” E. L. Doctorow hit the nail on the head with that one because I feel very much like someone with multiple personalities. Seriously. These characters have been beating up the inside of my brain since 2007. Now that I am actually beginning their story they won’t shut up. It is like a permanent party in my brain space. When I sleep I dream about them. It is maddening.
They aren’t the first characters to live in my head. In high school there was a whole different book be-boppin’ around up there. They still come to visit every once in a while but their almost see through now. Like my disinterest in finishing their story is making them fade away. It almost makes me feel like a murderer knowing that they used to be “living, breathing beings” and they will never have their story told and will die when I die. It is sad…but their story wasn’t the one I am meant to write. This one though….this one is the one.
The part that is gonna be so damn hard is keeping the friggin story line straight. There are so many damn complicated twists and turns. I would love to sit down with J. K. Rowling or Dan Brown or Jodi Picoult and just pick their brains. I almost get a headache when I think about how crazy it is gonna be to do this and how much I don’t wanna screw it up.
Also… writing a blog post is easy for me. (For one I don’t give two shits about grammar and correct anything when I am babbling in this blog.) When I read back posts I am quite satisfied with what I have put down. The fact that my “blog style” and my “book style” are on two different ends of the Rachel’s Writing Spectrum is frustrating. Writing six pages, reading them back and thinking they suck…sucks.
Okay….that is enough whining for now….lunch break is over. Time to get back to work and be a productive PS2… blarg.
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